5 Small Ways To Deal With Big Change

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5 Small Ways To Deal With Big Change

Over the past two years, we’ve all had more than our fair share of change where just as we start to get used to things, we are forced to pivot once more. Fortunately, the latest pandemic developments seem to be moving in a positive direction but there may still be lingering worries about moving along with our busy lives. So how do we deal better with change? Well we hope these 5  tips can help ease this burden in very important ways.

 

Take stock of what’s happening

It is not unusual that when change happens we immediately swing into action. But often this is just a logistical tactic in order to defend against it and make it go away quicker. Here we think we are protecting ourselves from the danger out there, but really we are protecting ourselves from the difficult feelings it evokes in us all. So a first port of call is to check in with yourself and acknowledge that somewhere this change feels very precarious and that it is incredibly hard to sit with the challenging feelings it evokes. 

Even good change causes stress

We are definitely creatures of habit so even a positive change can cause a stress response. When we feel anxious, like a vintage radio, our minds start scanning the environment for signs of potential danger. This is true of any unknown and so we may find ourselves wondering if this nice new thing might be taken away from us, or how it may inconvenience someone else. When we get our needs met, it evokes all sorts of unconscious emotions and these may need to be acknowledged in order to settle the score. 

Maintain your routine as much as possible

One of the reasons the pandemic caused such upheaval is because it threw out everyone’s schedules in the most profound ways. Our minds really like structure and predictability as it somewhere communicates that (as hard as things are) things will return to normal. So in the midst of change, where possible maintain what you can like by ensuring meal times happen regularly, that families continue to eat together, that bedtimes happen as planned and that you still exercise (even if you don’t feel like it). All these things then provide an anchor to your day and allows your mind to rest a bit. If things are very stressful, try writing down your daily schedule and tick it off as you go to give yourself less to think about. 

Stay away from social media

It may feel counter intuitive, but the way social media is structured, it can totally flood your system with too many other unknown entities. The algorithms inherent in social media literally ‘push’ items into your orbit and force you to think about things. This is going to activate the part of your mind that is already negotiating tons of  worrying unknowns. So it is so important to find an outlet that is contained like watching a series or reading a book.

Try to be proactive

In the face of change, your instinct may be to try and control the situation but this won’t work as it will have a manic quality where you try and control what may not be in your power. Rather, instead of being reactive to the situation, rather be proactive in how you are going to take on this challenge. Are you going to take stock of where you are, acknowledge what it’s evoking in you and find help with dealing with it? These proactive approaches will help you manage what you can and let go of what you can’t. 

The bottom line

Change is so tricky, and it can be very difficult to navigate all the deep feelings that get evoked in the face of changing tides. Hopefully these 5 tips can help you take a moment to navigate these things which may not be in your control, but which can absolutely be managed. 

Andy Cohen

Andy Cohen

About our Mommy Blogger: Andy Cohen is a TEDx speaker, psychoanalytic candidate, published author, Art Counsellor and mom of 2. Here this thoughtful mama shares insights gained along the busy road of motherhood, where nothing is quite as it seems. Her psychoanalytic training will also hopefully help all our moms think about old problems in a new way.
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